Tag Archive: WTF


HEY. HEY. CUT THIS SHIT OUT. NOW.

This bullying crap has been in the news long enough. Take it out. Right now. Wanna know why? People are now trying to FIX children that have NOTHING wrong with them so that they won’t be bullied.

Anyone see how backwards this is?

“Well, I should do whatever I can to protect my kids.”

“NOT THAT YOU IDIOT.” I want to screech, “What the fuck do you think you’re showing them?!”

“That I love them and want to protect them, so I’m taking away things that could–”

“No! No! You’re telling them that ‘You’re fat, your ears are too big, your head’s too small, so I’m going to fix it so you’re more acceptable to a superficial fucking society!'”

I want to take the woman that is taking her cute little seven year old to a plastic surgeon and turn her over to the authorities for sheer stupidity. You shouldn’t be CHANGING a perfectly cute kid to make her more aesthetically pleasing to people that are just going to find a reason to beat on her anyway if they don’t like her. What are they going to make fun of her for now? Probably getting plastic surgery.

And listen to that video: “Parents often get cosmetic fixes for their kids– think orthodontia or contact lenses.” WAT? Contacts have practical purposes. So does orthodontia, even though you could argue that that IS largely cosmetic in minor cases of teeth just coming in a bit askew. But you crazy bitch, this is permanently altering a little girl’s ears because why? She’s not pretty enough for a superficial society? There’s nothing wrong with her ears. They hear. They’re fine. They’re not going to cause her problems later in life with pain or causing physical issues. This is purely because her mother looked at her and said “Hmm, sorry little Sammie, you’re not pretty enough for kids to not beat up. So, let’s fix that.”

Hey, I might just be extra pissed because this kid has my name and because I was bullied, but not for the reason you’d think. Not because “hey, my parents should have protected me like hers! Boo hoo!” No, because this is fucking going out and telling the kids that bully that “Hey! It’s okay to beat on that kid because he has a weird head. His parents should have had the good sense to make him more pleasing to look at.” Now, I’m jumping to an extreme here, but what’s next? People going to start killing kids because they’re not born pretty enough, so they wanted to “save them a lifetime of suffering?!”

You know what we need to START doing? Not having plastic surgery done to perfectly functional kids. We need to start giving those kids the tools and permission to hit back. This kid, Casey Heynes, is my goddamn hero. He’s the hero of nerds and picked on kids across the web. If this is what happened to little punk ass bullies, you can goddamnit bet they would realize that they ought to use more caution in who they pick to beat on. The only time in my life when that nonsense stopped was when I started hurling verbal barbs back and not taking shit. This BS of “Zero Tolerance” does nothing except punish the kids who had the *gasp* audacity to get sick of someone calling them a fat, stupid, ugly Satan worshiping cunt and deck the little fuck that was doing it. And all of you out there know how kids work– you were one. You know that if a kid seeks protection from an adult, shit just gets worse. You’re then a “pussy” for not fighting your own battles, and they’ll just torment you worse when the adults aren’t around.

No, what people need are parents who, when they find out their kid is bullying someone, be it by calling names, or making snide remarks, or beating them up– that kid gets really, and severely, punished for it. No more Xbox live for you, little Jimmy… you beat up Carl at school. Have fun in your room that NOW only consists of a bed and sitting in it for the next month staring at a wall. If you want to avoid that in the future, how about you leave other kids THE FUCK ALONE?!

Of course, some of you may think that the punishment of isolation for a month is a wee bit severe. Okay. Personally, what I think the most ideal punishment would be would NOT be isolation, but the fun of sending the kid to school in something for a week that will get his/her ass picked on and shunned and made fun of. If you know how it feels, suddenly things seem rather different. I realize that’s not PC and is just “encouraging such behavior” but I also sit here and go “How the hell else will they learn to empathize with the kids they’re victimizing?” Kids have illustrated time and time again they’re not the best critical thinkers. Telling them to “think about how it would feel!” does nothing if they have nothing to compare it to. How the hell do you expect them to learn that something hurts other than through experience?*

Now now, I know this goes against the touchy-feely, cuddly, “omg, my kid is the most precious little angel ever!” mentality most parents have. Thus, this new attitude that I believe needs to be instilled will shock and horrify the masses. However, you need to wise the fuck up, parents. You cannot raise your kids even half decently unless you see them as both your precious angel and a hellion of the first order, and recognize that your kids have just as much potential to do ill as any adult. It’s up to YOU to teach them to master that hellion within. It’s up to YOU to teach them that because you don’t like how someone looks it’s not okay to beat on them or tease them.

It’s also up to you, parents, to not enforce the negative bullshit that the hellions amongst children spit out. If your kid comes home crying because they’re being teased about their ears, you tell them they’re beautiful. You tell them they’re beautiful and not to listen to those other kids because they don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about. THEN you tell them they don’t have to put up with that shit. Tell them to have the fun I did as a kid: Tell them to ask the kid why it is they care about your ears. Ask them why it matters. Ask them why they feel the need to come over here and kick sand in your face over your ears, and why it is that such a stupid action makes THEM feel BETTER?

Trust me on this one. Teaching your kid to be a verbal ninja and ask the moron questions and force him/her to question why they’re being a jackass will pay off. They may get picked on, but it will be less frequent… and it will also help them to realize that the problem does not lie with them and their ears. It lies with those that choose to harp on differences for no reason other than “CAUSE IT’S WEIRD CAUSE I SAY SO.”

*Footnote On This Paragraph: No, I’m not condoning hitting your kids to show them hitting is wrong. I am, however, saying that it is perfectly okay that if your kid is hitting some other kid and refuses to stop, to do absolutely nothing to help when the other kid hits back, and when your kid comes running crying that they were hit, enlighten them that if they don’t like hitting when it is done to them, they shouldn’t do it to other people.

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It has been a strange, partly bad, partly good week. I started at a new job and, to my surprise, my tendency to just be hated on sight by women in an office environment was NOT limited to my summer cube job or various random interactions– no, it was that way here, too. This was not helped by the fact that the woman kept going over and over how “wonderful” a Christian establishment this place was (wish they’d advertised that one a little better) and being downright surly toward me. You want to be religious, that’s fine, but when your workers can only wear some sort of religious medallion to work as jewelry, there’s problems. Not a good idea to stay here long, methinks. Here’s hoping things are better away from this woman, who is technically not in my department.

Upset that I had somehow managed to offend this woman simply by existing, while trying to be very nice, all smiles, cooperative, etc. I fucking risked my life to come in that day, with heavy snow, poor visibility, and wind chills of -20+. I asked my friends what it was that was wrong with me, that, despite all that, this woman took one look at me and started being short, curt, and in some ways, downright mean. The answers were, frankly, surprising to a pessimist like myself.

I got that I was pretty and she was jealous, that I was too smart and it annoyed her, that I had the “Audrey Hepburn Effect,” defined as a quiet elegance that made common people feel common, and thus, acutely uncomfortable. I was amazed that so many people saw some sort of good in me. When I seemed surprised at the outpouring, one person commented that “the hardest thing in life is to see our own beauty and worth.”

It got me thinking in what may seem to be an arrogant, self-absorbed fashion. I’ll try my best not to let it be.

The thought was this: If I accept this idea that these things are true, why the fuck is it so difficult for me to get a job at every turn? Why is it that when I get a job, women just take one look at me and decide I’m evil?

I heard a variety of theories on this one too, the most common of which was that if a younger female arrives at a job, the elder, higher up woman immediately gets territorial and assumes the younger one will take their job. Some proposed that these women assumed I was after even more than their job, that I would somehow turn people against them or take things away from them because I’m considered more “attractive” than they are, and the younger didn’t help matters. Another is that they figure that because some would consider me “pretty” that they have to be extra hard on me, lest I think I can get away with whatever I want, because, everyone knows, pretty girls get off everything easy. Especially with men.

Really? There’s a reason I prefer working with men. They’re not batshit insane. They don’t shriek that at every turn people are keeping them “down” or discriminating against them, or bitching that a man finding them attractive, even if it is just their eyes lingering on a girl for a few seconds, sexual harassment. They don’t piss and moan that life is so *hard* for them because they’re not Megan Fox or who the fuck ever the star du jour is today. Furthermore, you know what? Males get over what I look like. It generally goes like this:

Male Coworker/friend: *awkward*
Me: I’m taken, yes these are real, yes they’re D+ cups, no you won’t ever touch them. Hand me that box, please.
MC: *blink* oh! Um…
Me: Don’t apologize. I don’t care. Admire if you want, just don’t let it interfere with work.
MC: *gives box* Okay. [insert job smalltalk here]

Naturally, it doesn’t always go that way (The situation I speak of above is in a very casual environment, not an office and CERTAINLY not with a supervisor. But the point is, If I don’t give a shit, or try to play it to get favors, or whatever, they get over it. They leave me alone. They treat me like their male coworkers, complete with lewd jokes and everything else because I DON’T CARE. Women, however… if you aren’t a part of their church/branch of military/daycare group/have kids to chat about they just hate you. That was the main problem at my summer job: Lady, I don’t give a fuck about your kids. Frankly, I think it’s unprofessional you bring them to work and then walk them around the office expecting everyone to “aww” at them. No, I don’t care that you’re pregnant. I don’t care when you’re due. I don’t care about your wedding, or your friend’s. I care about coming here, getting my shit done, and being left alone to do my job.

I wasn’t impolite and blunt as I’m being here, mind you, I just expressed no interest and made no motion to get involved in the office gossip pool. I didn’t care. That bothered the living shit out of them. They LIVE on office drama, why don’t I?!

It’s really quite simple: I’ve got better things to do with my life. If you don’t, then I think you need a serious rearrangement of priorities.

However, I’m contradicting myself. I make it sound like they spoke to me often, thus contradicting my statement they detested me on sight. They DID speak to me. They did, in passing, after I had been there a while. Mostly to gloat and go “OMG, LOOKY I GOT ENGAGED” when they did so to everyone, despite not liking me. However, when I didn’t fawn over them, it reinforced, I guess, what they initially thought: That I’m a terrible, cold, stuck up bitch who doesn’t care about making friends because I’m out for their job.

My male supervisor? He was FINE. He called me in when I fucked up, complimented my team’s work when it was spectacular. My teammate and I made friends with the IT guys and joked around with them because they liked computers and vidyagames, especially Mario. Guys were cool, civil, decent human beings and didn’t expect me to take non-work time to discuss things that were non-work related. We saw each other on breaks, on lunch. They didn’t come around to my cubicle squealing to their friends “OMG, MAH BABEH JUST KICKED I’M SOOOO EXCITED!”

Women in the workplace scare me. It’s why I want to get (back) into a mostly male staff. They may ogle my tits when I first show up, but they’ll eventually get past it and act like a human being. Women just hold grudges for fucking ever, and in this case, there’s nothing I can do. I’m not going to cut on my own face and become a Reaver just because you have low self esteem. And you know why?

It’s honestly because if you stopped holding grudges and smiled more often, you’d be pretty too. I’m of the opinion everyone has some sort of beauty about them– yes, outwardly. You have something. It might be smooth skin, a type of grace, great style, quirky taste in accessories– but something about you is attractive to someone. So stop shitting on me because you think I’m “prettier” than you, if that’s what your problem is. I can’t change the genetic configuration of my face. I dress modestly at work, I try not to draw attention to my naturally large chest (but, frankly, short of binding, if I’m wearing a t-shirt there’s not much I can do), I don’t wear lots of make up or anything else. I just want to come here, do my job, and be left alone. I’m not here to steal your job, you fucking lunatic. I don’t want it, and even if I did, I’d much rather earn what I get than try to “seduce” someone to get it.

So how about you lay off the attitude and leave me alone, savvy?

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